Friday, May 27

Just a Moment of Your Time Please...

Hello America...I have a few important questions for you.

You aren't a Jerk, are you?

You think Progress is Good, Right?

Your body is equipped with 4 Hearts and Gill-based Respiratory System, isn't it?

If you answered "Yes" to two of the above questions then you are exactly who I'm looking for BUT if answered yes to three of those questions then a word of advice, "Run and Hide" because the government will hunt you down and put you in a Zoo. (What can I say the government hates and loves to objectify people who think progress is good.)

Anyway back to the point at hand.

I'm in Love and her name is "Take 5". It's a new Candy Bar from Hershey that will make you renounce your possesions and replace them with peanut butter, caramel, pretzels, and sweet chocolate. I've taken to calling it God's Candy Bar.

Look if it's good enough for America, it should be good enough for you. Unless you are a Dirty Commie and I highly doubt that because as we all know communists don't own computers, they just stand in line all day for pantyhose and oranges.

Also, I was on the Today Show This Morning. See what I have to say about it here....


At 5:00 PM, Anonymous robyn said...

i am still somewhat ashamed i actually read a blog, but i must admit this was the funniest thing i have read in a very long time. i have similar feelings about this lovely candy bar and feel that it's only right for it to be recognized in such a manor.


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