Tuesday, August 8

Watch Me Get Maced in The Face....

I Shot a Movie with Billy Bob Thornton and Jon Heder called "School For Scoundrels" . It Comes out This September...

A lot think that maybe I have changed now that I'm in a movie not a chance, things are just different. Now when people come up to me and ask me, "Paul, What is it like Being a Movie Star?" First thing I say is "Don't Look me in the Eyes, You Freak!" Secondly if they haven't been in a movie, I just laugh in their face and say "You'll never know" then I hoist myself into my Hummer, which is towing another Hummer (which of course is running) then and I pump up the volume on my bootleg live album of Creed as loud as I can and drive far away from that person.

But if you really want to see how a Movie Star is Treated on the set, look at my Trailer.

Check This Shit out Y'all...First of all, everything is in my reach. Wall to Wall my Trailer is about 9 Motherfucking Feet (Suck on that Wil Smith). I can sit on my Couch (Which also doubles as a Bed-Thank You Very Much) and Reach the Sink or My Closet (Which Hangs conviently above me). Now a lot of stars request that the Bathroom sink be moved out of the bathroom I'm one of those dudes, plus check out my handy soap dispenser, just like real restrooms and I don't even want to mention my paper towel dispenser. Plus My Shades always stay down...Why? Because They are Bolted to the Wall. So Yeah Things are Pretty Good!


At 12:14 PM, Blogger Jared said...

I loved this entry! It was like, The Fabulous Life of Paul Scheer, except even better than vh1 could do.

I also demand that my sink be outside the bathroom, but I'm not a superstar, so I just stay in Best Western instead.

At 12:34 AM, Blogger Alexandria The Great said...

Awesome. &*_*& You. Are. Awesome.


Post a Comment

<< Home